Black Swan

Every known religion of the world teaches us to be moral and at all costs shun depravity. The seven deadly sins - wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy and gluttony - were vices that every Christian was required to abstain from. Hindus, believe that a sinful act will lead to a negative consequence, known as the principle of karma. In Islam, actions against the teachings of Allah are considered haraam, no matter how good the intention is. Living a life of virtue is all about of restraining yourself from corrupt actions.

But, sometimes, you know that your actions would be wrong but you still feel tempted to commit them? Does that mean that you have lost all morality? Is it perfectly acceptable to have immoral thoughts if you don't act upon them? A dirty thought hidden in your mind - which no one would ever know - would that make you sinful? Do you sometimes face an internal conflict, a "black swan" raising its head, nudging you to immorality?

My sister is a charming, adorable girl with her heart at the right place. She has always had a long list of friends and admirers. I am more of a loner, in candid words - socially awkward. I have never confessed to her, but there were times, when I felt envious of her for all the attention that she got. These thoughts were not grave enough to compel me to act in sinful ways so I won't be called an immoral person by the society. If you commit the act, you are reprimanded and that helps you get over the guilt. But if this "black swan"just flutters its wings in your mind and you never confess in the fear that people may judge you, your sense of guilt eats you inside.

A powerful job brings with it many pulls and pressures. Your idea of morality is put to test each and every passing day. In the eyes to the world, you may be pronounced honest but there are moments when temptations rise in your head. Somewhere you know that once you go down the slippery path, there is no looking back. But, your head says - just this one time and never again. There is a constant tussle between the white and the black swan. Maybe, the white one wins at the end, but does that absolve you of all misdeeds? Are you not guilty of "thinking" greedy?

The only saving grace with thinking dirty is that it goes on in your head, it harms you and not the society. But, each passing moment, you feel ashamed that the person you envy loves you and the society still holds you in high regard. So, how do you fight your inner demons and clip the feathers of the black swan?Christianity has a concept called the confession box - you can stand behind a curtain and accept your thoughts before a priest who is duty bound to remain tight-lipped. Accepting your sinful thoughts definitely involves immense courage ; knowing that people may judge you is not easy. But the kind of liberation you feel after shedding this load overbearing on your soul is profound. The black swan gets emboldened unless you face it - challenge it and you will see what a feeble little creature it is!